Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Why doesn't it come?


Why doesn't it come to me?
Somebody else has it, and I haven't got any.


I don't feel jealousy, I feel left out. As many times I've been left out as a child. The memory of those experiences have created the beliefs within me that I am not good enough as everybody else is, to get it. To get the manifestation I want. Yes, now it makes perfect sense. To mention some aspects that are still active in my vibration because of the belief system I have created that prevents me from realizing my own worth and to allow my desires to enter into my physical experience. 

While other kids in my vicinity had two parents to give them love and attention, I had none...or sometimes one, but not constantly enough to ensure my worth. While other kids, have two parents with stable income to provide them with things that ensured their worthiness, I had non. While other kids had two parents that at least one always came to school meetings, I had non. Well once I remember my mom came to my school meeting, and that was the happiest day in my life. But then, hearing that I am an exemplary student and hundred percent self guided and can always be trusted, do not really need “supervision”, no need to come to school meetings. Which sounds great, but now there is no flow of constant confirmation that I am good enough.. No encouragements that I can do it, that anything I wish can be accomplished by me. 


I had many sad days as a child, which I have ignored to look back at and just remember the good part. But now so many years later, I have wishes and desires and many of them have started to flow into my experience with ease, I still have some brakes on. And those breaks are my belief systems created as a child and reinforced through life, still active within me! And how do I know that? 

Well, I had a dream where there was a person whom I have very narrow view of..and he, who according to me, do not deserve to get that winning on the lottery, got it! And I, who I see as deserving, did not get it. And again, I feel like that child left out from Christmas gifts, when everybody else is being receiving it. It is important to notice here, that in my dream I did not felt that he should not have won, just the surprise that “even” he can win, and I cannot? It is also important to understand that he is as worthy as anybody and my view of him is not as it was before. I guess somewhere on the way I saw him as someone untrustworthy and therefore unworthy of his desires.

As I see it that way places me directly in poor consciousness category and that is also the cause for my limitation when I look at my self. Maybe therefore I have been trying during the years to play on the lottery and always hoping to win. And the weird part is that I almost always win, but I win small! And now thanks to this dream, and to this person in my dream I finally get it. 

The reason for me not winning Big is not because I don´t dream big, is because I don't see, feel my self as worthy. I've been reassuring this statement for long long time and now when I am awakening to who I really am , and realizing my own power of thought emotion and alignment I see clearly my bugs. And it feels great to acknowledge it. To bring it into the light and understand that point of view, that unworthiness I have been carrying around does not longer serve me. 


My beliefs were introduced by circumstances which today have no more power. 
Because all my power comes from Now, from clarity and alignment with my inner being, with the Source who knows my worthiness and loves me unconditionally. I now know who I am and that there is nothing that I cannot be, do or have. OH..it feels great to realize this, and to write it out of me..so it is no longer a hindrance, than a moment of clarification. And I love having moments of clarification, of relief. A moment of true self empowerment.

Soothing Words





I have crunch in my stomach because I am thinking the thoughts and have emotions and feelings about a specific subject that are not aligned with my inner being, with the perspective of the Source. Meaning, The thoughts I am thinking that make me feel bad are not how the source within me sees it. Meaning, I am hanged up on something that obviously my feelings are showing is not the path to what I want and therefore I feel bad. Meaning, when I realize that what I am thinking and feeling about that specific subject is not serving me, I will be able to move away from it by focusing on something else. Or, I have to find soothing words to take me off that specific subject and make the statement look more general. 

Like, I know what I am thinking is making me feel bad, and feeling good is what I want. Good staff come out from good feelings and there is where I want to go. I know that I am vibrational being and that I am living in vibrational universe. What I think and feel is creating my personal point of attraction and the law of attraction, the non physical, the source, the god, the universe is responding to it and brings more of it to match. I know that I do not need to figure it all out at once, and there is perfect timing for things to unfold so they can surprise and delight me. I trust the source within me knows what I want and the relationship between where I am and where I want to be, and always calling me towards it. The only thing I need to do is to relax and just chill, trust that everything always work out for me. Find a good feeling thoughts or words of appreciation in order to start feeling better. Distract myself with other fun things and simply move on.. 

The source which Am I and the non physical part of me are One the same. When I am aligned with the perspective of my inner being, I am allowing energy to flow. I am allowing the energy that creates worlds to flow to me and through me. At that point I look at my existence through eyes of source.   And what I see is that all is well with me and the world. Nothing is broken and nothing needs to be fixed.. I am doing just fine. There is nothing that I cannot have, be or do in this time space reality. If my life experience has the potential to awaken the desire within me, it also has the potential to deliver it to me. I just need to trust it and allow it. I need to become cooperative component to my desire..By letting go of all topics and subjects that are not serving me and I can feel it in my belly and my solar plexus if I am on the path to that relief. 

Yes, I am looking for relief. For fun and joy of being. I am looking for ease. It´s easy to breath, its easy to appreciate, it´s easy to love. I love to feel ease, I love when I know that things are flowing easy, and easy they get if I just trust that everything has its purpose and serves me in some way.  From now on I will only look at the things that I am creating around me as my own hundred percent creation that I will take credit for. I will acknowledge whatever occurs as it is for my own benefit always. 
Yes, I have decided that everything is for my own benefit, even the negative emotion I am feeling, because it gives me clarity, to redefine and clearly know what I prefer. I love come to conclusions and understandings, I love clarity, I love ease and flow, I love being The creator of my own reality, I love taking credit for all my creations, I love my guidance system that tells me when I am in alignment or not with my inner being. 

I love... the sun, I love this planet, I love the flowers, I love the universe, I love animals and plants, I love water, I love rainbows, I love, I love, I love..ME. I am best of the best of the best of the best. I am leading edge creator and my preferences and experiences are making me constantly grow and expand, and as a result the whole That IS expands and enjoys with me. It´s fun, it´s great, it´s amazing..to exist right here and right now in this time space reality where all the fun staff is.

Friday, November 1, 2013

You Must Cry



I have this strong impulse to write this to you. I hope that I can show you some light as others helped me to find my own. Don’t just read it, feel it. Every word every sentence is carefully selected for you. You have asked for answers long time, and here is your new beginning.


You see, when I look at you I see me. Well my old me. Ambitious, intelligent, strong, clever, hard yet soft, trustworthy, just, correct, polite, giving, nice..  just the way our surroundings as family, school and entire society have trained us for. Sounds pretty good don’t you think? We have good relationships, everybody can rely on us in every possible way... If there is something they can not do by themselves, no problem, they know that we can always figure it out for them and come with thoughts and solutions. We also have good materialistic life, comfort and freedom to choose from. Here comes the BUT part; Who am I?
The things I mentioned above? Noooo... that’s what everybody else trained me to be. And in their response I found comfort and sense of worthiness, I found confirmation and love. But you see, that’s just “conditional love”. Love based on conditions. I do this for you and you do this for me and as long there is a constant flow of conditions that goes Your way, you are feeling quite good and life circles. That’s why you always try to control conditions, like if you do this for me or behave in this way i will feel better. So you micromanage circumstances constantly and in that managing you find so much resistance. Because, every person whom you come in contact with including your children and husband, have their will of own. In the end you just get tired...
And when you do, all kind of what you perceive as negative things start to tire you even more.
So what do you do? Move? Separate? Hide?
Nooo..that’s again trying to control conditions.
You simply have to change the way you feel about everything and everyone.
You don’t blame on anybody or on anything else for how you feel. How you feel from now on will be your first and only priority, everything everything and everyone else comes second.
You must start caring for how you feel you see, that's the only way...


Everything we say, do or have is because of One thing and one thing only; We think we will feel better in having of it. So all day every day you are sifting and sorting through life, wanted and unwanted. By knowing what you do not want, you know what you do want. And whatever you give your focus to the universe brings more of it to you. Why? Because we exist as a vibration, everything is a vibration. And as a vibration we emit frequency. This frequency is based upon your own thoughts and feelings about any subject you might have and the universe responds to it constantly. You know then when you feel good, good things mostly happen to you..and when you feel bad, more bad things flow into your experience. So this means that you are the creator of your own reality. Weather you believe it or not, if you do it consciously or not.. You are still doing it. You have strong belief system and that means conditioned patterns of thoughts that constantly limits you to one and same reality. You simply think that you know what life is about and what’s  real and what’s not is one way and there is no outway. And I am sure that you are really good in justifying and explaining everything about your self and things you think you know with you perfectly clever brain. But remember that everything you think you know is because you have been conditioned so. I promise you, there is always more to life then things we interpret with our senses. There is more than you are allowing yourself to be, and if you really dare to go to that place you will know it to. Because by exploring the contrast of earth environment your life has caused you to expand, and what are you doing? You are not allowing your own expansion. The life giving energy that flow to you and through you is not allowed to flow. That causes all kind of discomfort and even physical illness. Now you have reached a point in your life where you have to change or you will create even more pain and discomfort in your life. You even had one accident not long ago, and that was a wake up call. You cannot continue deny your own expansion. Life will find a way to get your attention somehow.


Before you came into this body, you where pure positive energy. Let’s call it source. One part of you became focused into your body and the larger part of you is still that non physical pure positive energy. Before you came you said, I’ll go forth into this environment of contrast and explore and find out my own preferences and on the way I will have fun! I will take the thought to the place where it has never been before. And whenever I know what I want or do not want the larger part of me will directly become it! The whole source will benefit from it and so will I, and as a result the whole universe will expand. I will then match the frequency of my new expansion and get a new vantage point and with this new perspective I will dive again into the contrast and get new experiences. But if you live life and expand, and then deprive yourself of that new improved version of you, then you are stuck, small and lonely. Afraid and confused trying to control the world outside..


You must let go of the social mask you have created, let go of thoughts that no longer serve you. You must love you! You are great, wonderful wonderful creation. You are unique in your expression, there is only one you. There will never be anyone like you. You are precious to the source that creates all life. The source within you loves you and guides you towards your wishes and desires. But you must allow yourself to go...let the world take care of itself. Let the family take care of themselves. You only have two hands! The source that creates worlds run through everybody and everything, so that is not your job anymore, it has never been. Stop worrying what others think and do and focus on what makes you feel good. You are an eternal being with such power that you can choose anything anything you want to live and experience and the source will always support you. You are so free to choose, so you can choose bondage if you want. The whole existence is based upon never ending expansion. Let go of everything you think you know and just start simple..with some words of appreciation, talk to your self, observe what you are thinking of and most important how you feel. Cry cry cry cry for all the hard times that you have been through, but that your are now grateful for.


Here are some words to give you an idea how the focus work
I think too much
I worry too much
I work too much
I care too much
I am afraid too much
I am scattered too much
I am confused too much
I am sad too much
I am depressed too much
NO, I can say it better!
I will focus on positive aspects on my self and everything else
I will start noticing what I am thinking of
I will start feeling better
I know I can feel better
I know that there is more to know
I love knowing more
I love the information
I love reading
I love noticing how I feel
I love knowing that the sun goes up every day
I love knowing that earth spins in its orbit in perfect proximity to other planets
I love nature
I love animals
I love being in forest
I love breathing
I love love sleeping
I love getting tired and then sleeping
I love waking up and knowing I can start fresh
I like starting fresh
I like feeling fresh
I like looking at my children
I like how they look at me
I love them, but I love me even more
I love my husband
I love him, but I love me even more
I love my family, but I love me even more
I love the love
I love the life
I love my iphone
I love my job
I love kitchen
I love my fridge
I love the eggs
I love the honey in my tea
I love taking a shower
I love my body
I love my clothes
I love me
I love me
I love ME


Monday, October 21, 2013

You in short



You are vibrational being existing in a vibrational universe. You where the source energy before you came into this body. A larger part of you still IS that source, the one that responds to your frequency of your thoughts and feelings. Your past present and future are just a fragment in the totality of all existence and it's being played out in the real time, which is not same as your now time. Your mission is to explore the contrast of earth environment by sifting and sorting, and when you know what you do not want, you know what you do want. The larger part of you, your inner being becomes what you asked for and holds that frequency until and if you find your way to match it. Every thought produces a feeling that guides you towards wanted or unwanted. Your feelings tells you if the source within you agrees on the same subject or not. Then new ideas get born and you take the thought where it has not been before, and then you expand and become more. And the whole universe becomes more and you have a new standing point then you just had... And then again you explore, you become more, you align with what you have become and again have a new standpoint from which you continue towards more.. As more you understand, higher you fly and closer you are to your larger part of you, to your source. Taped in to the source you have clarity and broader perspective, you are being aligned with everything that is and you start to live in a universal real time sense where you no longer see a separation between you and everything else. But you, your point of view will always be unique and valuable in all infinity.  

Thursday, October 17, 2013

Me & You

I am not yours and you are not mine
We can walk together but you cannot steal my shine.

What ever you say or what ever you do..Well
I don't care, because it's all in you.

We can take pictures and travel together,
but in the end nothing is forever..

When I'm done with the life I'm living,
I will leave this place and know that it was giving.

The only thing I care most about, is to feel good with you,
or without.


Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Life = Feeling



Life = Feeling = You = Past-Present-Future = NOW = Source = You = Real Time = Infinity

How to define Life better as not as a feeling. When you use your senses and define something with a word like for example “beautiful” or “tasty”..what does this word mean, what does it make you feel? It makes you feel good. So what ever you do, think or say it's bringing you a feeling. Emotions are therefore equal to Life it self. Life is emotions, the experience it self.

You equal your past, your present and your future. Which all have the potential to make you feel good or bad if you prefer. But it all happens in the NOW, the real time of the universe, of the source of everything that is.

In the “real” now where you think your future is, is bigger part of the Source there you also are and constantly trying to connect to, align with, flow with. Well there, you are flying on the high flying disc and perceiving time without any referents to your past, present, future. You just are, and the time is always NOW. From here everything looks so simple, effortless and easy. From here you feel powerful and eternal. From this place you know that there is nothing that you can or cannot do, but does it really matter? With this broader perspective you look down at your life story and everybody else and feel that all is good, all is perfect.

Whenever you feel negative emotion is because the Source with in you does not share the same opinion about the same subject. If you for example hate something or somebody, Source does not join you in that thought. Therefore you feel split energy, therefore you feel negative emotion. The source is pure positive energy which always only Loves = pure positive emotion. This guidance system, this compass you have built in is your guide trough life, through feelings and experiences. It tells you if you are on your path to your alignment which you really are or far from it. So stop thoughts, feelings and doings that do not make you feel good. Stop trying to explain to others, who do not understand. Focus on the NOW you want to join with, and with that clarity you will live, feel and experience more and more and more...Because there is no end to it, you will never be done..Therefore life is infinite expansion.

Infinite=More

Life causes you to ask. Through the contrast you are living, you are sifting and sorting and by knowing what you do not want, you know what you do want. And when you align with the frequency of your desire, you have thought it, felt it and it has even manifested for your senses to absorb it completely. You have now launched a new desire. Then you again think it, feel it, imagine it and live it whether it manifests or not, until you continue the process all over again...so there is no end to it.. always more..never done. Always incomplete, like this message I am writing. It's complete now, but..there is always more which I am reaching for..and you!



Thursday, October 10, 2013

What is life really?


You want to know what really life is about? Well, It's not what you do or how you do it. It's not about with whom or where it happens. It's about... A thought. If you can think it, imagine it and feel it, then you are living it! Everything is just a thought-form, and if you have thought it, imagined it and felt it long enough, then it has already manifested as physical, but in that same moment it's no longer current life experience, it becomes your history. Your current thoughts and feelings are present tense, it's now-life. 
That's it, that's all that is to it.  So think, imagine and feel your way trough the life. Focus on the thoughts that always make you feel better and you will live everything that you possibly can think of..


Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Inspiration comes, and it comes again..



..inspiration comes and it comes again..even though at the moment you can feel satisfied and might think that everything is complete. You've done such a good job and now you can just stop doing everything, because you are done. It's completed, there is no more to it..or is it!? I can assure you that nothing will ever be completed and never ever done, because that is not in our nature as humans. Our nature is to constantly expand and always wanting more.. so you see, you can never be done, finished or do it wrong, no matter what the subject is. You can only feel the satisfaction in the moment when the new idea is born or you are having a new experience, not long after you will be bored and looking for a new one. Example, You buy a new pair of jeans and you feel good about your choice in the moment, but not long after you feel that the "only" thing missing is..a new belt to match, or bag..or jacket or..whatever...So it never stops, you cannot stop your own expansion, your own progress. You can try, but that is what causes you not to feel good.
Eventually your inner being will find a way to get your attention. Like a sickness or an accident...

I have put so many hours in creating something inspirational, it was so exciting and fun to do..For a while, I was so satisfied that I said, I'm not changing anything about it! It's perfect.. But today a new idea got born, about the same thing..And guess what!? I figured a new way in seeing the same thing, and how I see it now from before is not better, just different and that difference makes me more satisfied, because the old way started to feel boring.. So we are not meant to do the same thing over and over and over for the rest of our lives. We are not meant to hang out with the same people over and over and over for the rest of our lives. We are meant to use our senses for pleasure and expansion. We talk for pleasure, we smell for pleasure..we touch for pleasure, we taste for pleasure...we hear for pleasure..we think for pleasure of it. Life is supposed to be fun, we are meant to fulfill our dreams. We are meant to feel good and feel our way into the things wanted in our experience..
It easy to get this, if you are ready to hear it.

You where the source energy before you came into this body.
A larger part of you is still that source in this vibrational universe.
The part that is focused into your body has the ability to focus thoughts and by that feelings
which work as your point of attraction. Your vibration decides what you are attracting into your reality.
Yes, you are 100% creator of your reality. The larger part of you (the source) is responding to the signal you are sending at all times and automatically become that what you have asked for. The vibrational frequency of asking is not the same as of answering. Therefore if you ask , you must allow it to come by being a vibrational match to what you have asked for. And how can you do that? By feeling your way to that.. If you feel bad, it means you are far from it, if you feel good that you are in  proximity of it. Feeling good should be your highest and the only priority. The circumstances do not matter. Focus on what you prefer and unwanted things will diminish because your attention is turned away from them. Do not care for what others are doing, mind your own business and you will find out more about who you are and why you have come forth. In the end, that is what this is all about. To take the thought to the place where it has not been yet before, for the sake of your own expansion and expansion of the whole everything that is ..You are a creator of your reality and nobody and nothing can ever never take that away from you, but you. Life you've lived has caused you to expand and by aligning with that what you have become vibrationally, is caching up with who you really are. To start practicing allowance is to start accepting that everything that is ..is as it is and so it is. There are no judgments, left or rights..there are just thoughts. Everything that is..was, and will be is some form of thought.

Become aware of your thoughts and feelings and you will deliberately start to create your own reality. Right now like many people you are creating by default. They look around and they observe what is on for example TV and newspapers, that is being their point of attraction and they just get more of that. Use your imagination to create feelings that you prefer instead and that will be the signal you are sending out for the universe to respond to. Go easy about your life and do not take it so seriously..after all, we are all here to play...We can not ever get it done and we cannot ever do it wrong..because we are eternal beings and eternal expansion is our natural state of being.

Sunday, June 16, 2013

What do you do nowadays?

Often I get the question: what are u doing nowadays? 
Well, here's my answer to everybody that cares:

Sleeping mostly;) meditating, paying attention to my thoughts and feelings. Paying attention to my reaction to the world outside. Breathing. Giving positive affirmations to me, people and things. I'm making sure that I am always feeling good about my self and there is nothing I need that could make me happier then just being me. I practice being me that includes love compassion acceptance and understanding for my self and all life around me. I love being my self and knowing that I am the life it self and unique in its expression, there's no one and will never be someone like me. I love knowing that my soul is fearless and beneath no one, that my soul is equal to everyone else. I love knowing that I am humble and everything exists because of compassion. I love knowing that I am eternal vibrational being and I create my own reality by being the first positive change that I want to manifest. I love knowing that I am supported by life creating intelligence and that all my desires are being for filled when I'm ready to receive it. I am practicing alignment with that which am I. 




Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Outside terror


There are days when you feel separation between you and the things around you, so called "world outside". It happens when we cannot accept or understand why the things happen as they already have happened. Why did I get sick, why the washing machine broke, why I have to pay more taxes etc.. Our physical mind cannot make any sense of, by it perceived as "negative things". But stay patient and you will see that in the end things do come around, and the initially perceived as negative thing turns into positive thing. Most of the time if you reflect back you can understand why it happened. To give you one example how the negative turns into positive.
When I was sick I had time to feel the pain and rethink my life, before sickness I was falling into some kind of depression and wanted the life to end. When the fever was over and I got stronger and started to eat again, I was so happy...just to be able to eat and drink again and "life will" returned to me stronger then ever before.

So, maybe you need couple of hours, or one sleepless night to get over it, but when you do and accept the fact that it already have happened, then you can consciously review if you can do something about it or not. Most of the times we cannot change what happened but we can accept is-ness in order for it to transform. At later point you should get an understanding why it happened. Then the process of acceptance will be faster next time something happens.

Eventually thinking that world outside is terrorizing you, when all you want is peace is not completely truth.
There is no world outside, there is only you. All situations have you created mostly unconsciously so you can learn from them. The energy you put out is yours and it will at some point come back to you as positive or as negative, but being negative is not a punishment but learning opportunity.
Here's an other example.
The washing machine broke, because I was really never satisfied with it.. I was missing "drying" function as well. So now I understand why it broke, and what I need to do.. I will buy a machine that both washes and drys!

Finally understanding that you are not separate from the world outside, you are that same world created in your space called consciousness and everything that emerges in it IS You. Surrender, accept, let it flow and it will transform, because nothing ever stays unchanged.



Thursday, March 14, 2013

Shift your reality-really!



At this point you should know that you are infinite consciousness that experience your physical reality through your vehicle called body. You are unique expression of life and being You is the only mission you have in your life. Being you to best of your abilities and just act upon your greatest excitement at the moment, will bring you understanding that you are living your path you self have laid in front of you. Your spirit/soul/consciousness is already on another level and you are here just as an extension of your higher self. Again, you are here because you need to live this experience and bring back what you have learned to your higher self, to the ocean of consciousness, to the creation itself.

Now, at this point you should also know that everything that exists is a vibrational energy with specific frequency. Which frequency you vibrate in is determined by your own state of mind.
The world you see and think you are in right now, is not only one world, one earth. You are constantly shifting through billions of parallel realities per second, and every parallel reality is similar to the other one so you perceive it as continuity, but it’s not. There is no motion then one your thinking processes create. You are shifting from frame to frame like in a foto film with still pictures. So you see, you and only you can change your own reality by changing your state of mind. Your state of mind is reflected as the world you perceive, and changing your state of mind means changing your world, your reality. The world outside is nothing else than a projection of your state of mind, like you are looking at your self in the mirror. If you want the projection in the mirror to smile, you must smile first and the image in the mirror has no choice but to reflect that smile.

Again, every each of us experience our own reality and the world outside reflects that. Knowing and understanding this process will allow you to start consciously making choices that will reflect your reality. You change by acting upon your highest excitement and trust that the creation itself will support you in any choices you make in that moment. Visualise the world you prefer and act like it’s already your reality even if outside world still looks the same. But do not get attached to the outcome of you visualisation because your physical mind is not capable of perceiving everything. Your higher mind is your guide. Allow yourself to quiet your thinking processes and you will increase your intuition, your connection to higher self.

-Become timeless by living in the present moment, the Now is the only moment there you are and from there you can make conscious choices.

-Practice acceptance of any people, situations, circumstances and things.
Everything is just positive and negative energy (not good or bad, right or wrong)
All life experience is by contrast, therefore we cannot judge anything really. Accept the isness of opposite values.
It is as it is.

-Practice defenselessness, you do not need to defend your self or react upon anything at all because it just escalates further resistance. Thing that get resisted= persist!... and you want change, so...stop reacting.
-Let go of your belief systems, habits and “old earth” vibrations. Is’s just so old old old..religion, marriage, cigarettes and tv-watching,  are some examples. If you want the new reality, let go of the old one.

-Shift into the parallel reality which you prefer by being that frequency first.

-Start NOW


This moment was my greatest excitement to share this document and I’ve acted upon it.
For me it does not matter if I have 1 reader or 1000, or none..I know that somewhere those words will inspire, otherwise I would not write them in first place.

L O V E

Saturday, January 5, 2013

Look inside God


God is a name created by some to separate you, when really there's no separation. God IS You working trough your own will of life and creating choices with your Consciousness. God is nothing external and when you quiet your mind, you will know it. What you know, needs no justification. "It's like being in love. Nobody can tell you that you are in love, you just know you are". The choices of your existence you have already made, as you go by with your life you will understand why you've made them.