Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Have you ever thought that you are not sufficient and good enough for this world? Honestly, I haven’t! But constantly I come in contact with people who think just that. They are slaves to their own doubts and insecurity and this could be by mistake, taken as disadvantage by them selves and others… Confusing? Let me explain.
Each and every individual on this earth is special and unique, and each and every of them has their own qualities and attributes that can in combination with other individuals achieve great things and or just a perfect harmony. We complete each other!
“DISC is the four quadrant behavioural model based on the work of William Moulton Marston PhD (1893–1947) to examine the behaviour of individuals in their environment or within a specific situation.”
According to DISC theory people could generally be divided into 4 different types:
D – Dominant
Brain oriented, decisive, dominant, self-assured, forceful, task oriented, instigates, leads and directs
Heart oriented, motivates others via influence and persuasion, good communication skills, presents well, friendly, affable, inspires others, intuitive, gregarious
Heart oriented, reliable, dependable, process-oriented, listener, solid, friendly, trustworthy, methodical
Brain oriented, painstaking, investigative, curious, decides using facts and figures, correct, checker, detailed
D & I are generally proactive and extravert, while S & C is generally reactive and introvert.
Of course keep in mind that this is just a general dividing and your own personality can be anywhere in between those 4, but all of us have one side that is always tend to be stronger.
All those types of people have different characteristics and orientation, motivation, focus, fears, expressions, adoptions, way of communicating and way of thinking. But we are as much as dependent of each other and what I am trying to say is that one is not better then the other, just that we all are different and cannot function without those differences.
Imagine a world only with dominant people!? They would just compete with each other and probably destroy each other in the process. If we only had I-people, they would most likely just talk them selves to death and only S-people would make this world the most boring place in universe, while C-people would exchange their bodies and minds for a cybernetic once so they can do their calculations more detailed and correct! As you can see there is no success without you! You are needed as you are and your personality and qualities make a difference! So, stop thinking that you are better or worst then some one else, you are just a peace of the puzzle.
Try to understand your personality and find peace inside you. Then everybody else will either love you or hate you, but at least you will be sure of who you are and know that you do not have to live up to others expectations. You will meet your match!
Comparing your self to somebody else is a waste of energy and won’t do anything for your personal development or make your feelings calmer. You should embrace your differences and take advantage of them; this goes both for your mental and physical appearance!
Anybody can be anything they want in this life, but if you don’t!? It’s not because you can’t, it’s just maybe because it’s not that important to you… In other words ...you don’t care that much.
Because we are so unique and fabulous we can also adapt, some more easily then others, but in the end everybody can! To communicate with one unique individual you can use this DISC model and apply it to the people you meet. You can quickly discover who is how if you just give it a thought. It has nothing to do with “making friends” just pure communication. Friends come naturally, and the rest of the people are just a train that takes you from one point to an other. Understanding how somebody else works teaches you how you should act and how you should interpret this communication. If everybody in the whole world where doing this, the life would be much easier and more fun for everybody. But it’s not!
After establishing ones characteristics you can treat them like this in order to achieve good communication. I can think of many social occasions, but mostly the work.
Include all related relevant info (do not improvise)
Focus on important stuff
Support on documents
Maintain some distance
Let them win
Give them immediate feedback
Focus on the matter
Show them interest
Let them talk
Be impartial /fair
Make concrete questions
Provide them with antecedents to reduce uncertainty
Proceed in a logical shot
Count on their help/ integrate them
Give them some time for trivialities
Help them be popular
Focus on peoples concerns
Do not get into details